Yesterday was the staff vs. students basketball game at the middle school. There is something about a white basketball jersey that just does not flatter a middle-aged teacher's body. Anyway. I was fortunate enough to beg out of participating, but I did go and watch a little. One of my students asked me why I wasn't playing and I said that I didn't know how to play basketball and he says with the most possible sincerity:
"That's OK, just try your best!"
He has a point. Dammit.
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Thursday, May 28, 2009
On eyeballs and other gross things:
During the weekly check-in with my first and second graders about how their weekend was, 'Tavito share the following, much to the dismay/horror/fascination of the other kids:
"My uncle killed a toro....in the campo....there was blood everywhere. I saw the heart, it was big like this (makes football sized shape with his hands). I touched the eye, it was soft. Like a bed."
And that is when I peed a little in my pants I was trying so hard not to laugh.
***
It is officially the homestretch of the school year and I'm trying not to let on that I want out of my classroom more than the kids do. It occurred to me the other day as I checked my personal email for the 27th time before noon that I need more friends at work. I am kind of isolated in my position because I split my time between separate schools (and it doesn't help that said schools are in a small town in the middle of the countryside and stuck in some previous decade). However, the other side of this beautiful equation is that no one (read: authority figures/bosses) has any idea where I am. Were I of lesser moral fiber this could be deadly, but being the fine paragon of virtue that I am, I have only taken advantage of this once, and no one even noticed that I rolled in two hours late on conference day. So I told them. And they didn't care. So I left early.
Yep, I showed them.
"My uncle killed a toro....in the campo....there was blood everywhere. I saw the heart, it was big like this (makes football sized shape with his hands). I touched the eye, it was soft. Like a bed."
And that is when I peed a little in my pants I was trying so hard not to laugh.
***
It is officially the homestretch of the school year and I'm trying not to let on that I want out of my classroom more than the kids do. It occurred to me the other day as I checked my personal email for the 27th time before noon that I need more friends at work. I am kind of isolated in my position because I split my time between separate schools (and it doesn't help that said schools are in a small town in the middle of the countryside and stuck in some previous decade). However, the other side of this beautiful equation is that no one (read: authority figures/bosses) has any idea where I am. Were I of lesser moral fiber this could be deadly, but being the fine paragon of virtue that I am, I have only taken advantage of this once, and no one even noticed that I rolled in two hours late on conference day. So I told them. And they didn't care. So I left early.
Yep, I showed them.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
On all things inappropriate
A 5th grade student today realized the following:
"Ms. Lady, if my name is Maggie Fernandez, then my initials are inappropriate." Uhhh...can you elaborate? "You know....MF....MFer...."
Yeah, Maggie, I guess they are. And I guess it is a sweet day when a 12 year old is telling you what is and isn't appropriate.
All of this came about during a wild round of Balderdash, which is pretty much my favorite thing to do when the lesson plan ends early. I was playing a round once with my middle schoolers and a student chose the word "impala." The dictionary said only that it was an African antelope, but one of my 8th graders knew better:
"Oooohhh! I know this one, its a sweet car."
"Ms. Lady, if my name is Maggie Fernandez, then my initials are inappropriate." Uhhh...can you elaborate? "You know....MF....MFer...."
Yeah, Maggie, I guess they are. And I guess it is a sweet day when a 12 year old is telling you what is and isn't appropriate.
All of this came about during a wild round of Balderdash, which is pretty much my favorite thing to do when the lesson plan ends early. I was playing a round once with my middle schoolers and a student chose the word "impala." The dictionary said only that it was an African antelope, but one of my 8th graders knew better:
"Oooohhh! I know this one, its a sweet car."
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Is this what 'all staff' emails are for?
"It is rumored that some kids are or are threatening to spit in the hand sanitizer we have in our rooms. I suggest that we glue the lids on as they do not need to be opened (if you have the pump variety). I also suggest that if you hear of anyone that is saying they or someone else is doing this, you send them to the office. thanks."
***
Where do I start?
1) Things that might possibly take precedence:
uh, teaching?
2) At the risk of stating the obvious: ISN'T HAND SANITIZER SUPPOSE TO SANITIZE THINGS?
3) Is this going to take the form of a staff "let's glue the lids on our hand sanitizer bottles" party? I will bring the blow.
4) The asshat that wrote this is at least twice my age, and has been teaching longer than I've been alive. I would like to hope that by the time I reach this distinguished station in life that I won't be flexible enough to get my head that far up my own butt.
***
Where do I start?
1) Things that might possibly take precedence:
uh, teaching?
2) At the risk of stating the obvious: ISN'T HAND SANITIZER SUPPOSE TO SANITIZE THINGS?
3) Is this going to take the form of a staff "let's glue the lids on our hand sanitizer bottles" party? I will bring the blow.
4) The asshat that wrote this is at least twice my age, and has been teaching longer than I've been alive. I would like to hope that by the time I reach this distinguished station in life that I won't be flexible enough to get my head that far up my own butt.
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