This actually happened.

On one of my many "let's see if this bus will take me where I need to go" adventures last week, I was witness to what is thus far the Craziest Fucking Thing that has happened while I was on a bus. There is a lot of competition for this title, so I take it very seriously. I was attempting to take the 48 after taking the 44, but oops, the road that the 48 goes on was under construction, so I was wandering a little aimlessly until I saw a major intersection where I thought surely there would be a bus stop. There was! There was also a man being frisked over the hood of a police car in front of what I can only assume is one of those Chinese Buffet/titty bar/prostitution fronts that Seattle is known for. So I get on the bus, trying to figure out if this will indeed take me where I need to go, when I realize that the man sitting across from me is apparently blind and trying to reach across the aisle and touch me because I smell good. No, really. This is what is happening! He is blindly groping through the air in my general direction because he says that "someone smells good." Christ. The one day I shower AND put on deoderant, this is what happens. He gets pretty darn close to touching me so I politely ask him not to. Fast forward to the next bus stop when a blind woman gets on the bus and through some cruel twist of fate sits down next to the groping blind man. She appears to be a professional woman in her 40s, he appears to be mentally ill and in his 30s. She has an actual cane, he has some sort of stick he has fashioned into a cane. He proceeds to tell her about his "blindness" which is not actually blindness (seeing as when she asked where he lived he gestured to the neighborhood we were in which HE COULDN'T EVEN SEE), but I'm not sure that this woman realizes that because SHE IS TRULY BLIND. I am watching all of this with some sort of horror/amusement combination. And then I missed my stop.